Should She Speak Up...Or Stay Silent? When Protecting a Friend Means Reopening Your Own Personal Wounds

Reader Note: This story contains references to past childhood harm that may be sensitive for some readers.

Hadiza and Grace met in church. Although their backgrounds differed sharply, they quickly became great friends.

Hadiza grew up in a loving home where both parents were devoted to each other and to their three children. They lived in the middle-class part of town.

Grace lived in the most affluent part of town with her grandmother in an extravagant mansion. Her parents were missionaries and were always gone. They had travelled to war-torn Sudan last year to serve in their various capacities as medical and legal practitioners. Grace wished her parents spent more time at home rather than in saving the world.

Both girls always looked forward to Sundays.

This particular Sunday, Grace had a secret to tell Hadiza.

“So… are you ready for what I have to tell you?” Grace asked excitedly after church service.

Hadiza knew that her answer didn’t matter. Grace would proceed with the talk anyway.

“I agreed to be Alfred’s girlfriend on Thursday!” Grace blurted, then clapped her hands over her mouth as if to take back the words.

Hadiza was equally surprised. Alfred? Certainly not that Alfred!

“Alfred? The guitarist? The Reverend’s son?” Hadiza asked, deeply interested.

“Yes!” Grace was brimming with so much enthusiasm.

Hadiza’s face fell. Grace noticed the change in her friend’s demeanor immediately.

“Wait, what aren’t you telling me? He’s not a bad person, is he? I know he lives on your side of town. Tell me wassupppppppp.” Grace begged, searching Hadiza’s face with her eyes.

“Ummm, nothing.” Hadiza shrugged.

There was no use telling Grace about what had happened ten years ago.

“Please, Hadi, I think you’re not telling something. Wait! Were you liking him too?” Grace theorized.

“What? No!” Hadiza objected rather too vehemently.

“Are you sure?” Grace insisted.

“Yes. I am one thousand percent sure,” Hadiza laughed.

“Thank God, because I wouldn’t have let you have him, by the way.” Grace jabbed Hadiza’s side playfully.

“You have him all to yourself, my dear. I don’t want the tiniest bit of him,” Hadiza said dramatically.

Both girls laughed heartily and prepared to part ways to meet again next week.

Later in the night, as Hadiza lay in bed, she thought about their conversation.

Alfred was a charming guy. He was also really talented. It was really hard for people to not like him… except for her.

She hated Alfred with everything in her being.

Alfred had assaulted her as a child when she was seven years old and he thirteen. Well, it was in the distant past, but he had still done it.

She thought about telling Grace about this, but Grace had a runny mouth and the entire church would hear about it.

What if he had changed? He seemed to love the Lord sincerely. Why use his distant past to bar a budding relationship between two young believers?

What if he hadn’t changed? What if church was just a cover for his now grown-up, calloused heart?

Hadiza was torn.

Dear reader, what should Hadiza do?

Comment your thoughts ⬇️

Final note of love...

For anyone carrying a similar, painful story, may you know that the Lord is near to the brokenhearted and gentle with your healing. You are not alone, and God sees and cares deeply about every hidden hurt.