Pull Up a Chair: A Mother-Daughter Q&A

I just want to start today's post with a sincere, 'Thank you' for being here. This little corner of the internet has become such a meaningful space for Gemma-Elizabeth and me, not because we think we have profound, earth-shattering wisdom to offer, but because we believe there is something special about honest community. We all wrestle with things. We all carry questions, hopes, struggles, and little everyday thoughts that matter more than they may seem. And if pulling up a few more chairs to the table means we get to think, laugh, reflect, and put "pen to paper" (or fingers to keys) together, then we are all in for that.

Gemma-Elizabeth and I both feel that if we are wondering about something, wrestling through something, or simply curious about it, there is a good chance someone else is too. So wherever you’re reading from today, and whatever brought you here, thank you for spending a few moments of your busy day with us. We never take that lightly.

Since we show up here pretty faithfully each week, we thought it would be fun to do another mother-daughter Q&A. To be honest, we do not always find ourselves all that fascinating...but since so many of you continue to read along each week, we thought it might be a nice chance to open up more personally. So that is the heart behind today’s post: Gemma-Elizabeth and I each asked each other three questions. We hope this feels a little like sitting in on a cozy conversation. And if anything we share resonates with you, we would love for you to join us in the comments. There is always room for you here.❤️

Gem's Questions for Catherine

1. How do you discern God's voice versus your desires and fears?

God’s Word, first and foremost. Psalm 119:105 says, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path,” and that verse means so much to me that I had it tattooed on my left foot. Without God’s Word, I would be lost. For real--my fears would overtake me, and my desires would pull me in all kinds of wrong directions.

One of my biggest struggles has been the fear of people, the fear of disappointing them, hurting their feelings, or not having their approval. The Lord has really grown me in that area (Ouch! But also so freeing). His Word reminds me that I am already accepted in Christ, and because of that, I do not have to live chasing everyone else’s approval. I'll never have everyone’s approval anyway, and I have learned that God’s is the one that truly matters.

I also look at whether what I am feeling lines up with Scripture. When I feel wronged, for example, my flesh wants vindication, but God’s Word tells me to forgive, pray, and leave vengeance to Him. That helps me discern the difference. Feelings are strong, and they can feel so right but be so wrong. I also seek wisdom from mature believers I trust, and I pray. In the last year, especially, God's shown me just how powerful prayer really is.

2. Have you ever felt like your work didn't align with your purpose? How did you navigate that?

Yes, I have felt that before, both when I was working as a nurse and at times now as a professional organizer. The one place I have never felt that tension is motherhood. That has always felt deeply connected to purpose for me.

As a nurse, I often felt discouraged by how much of the medical system seemed driven by business and symptom management instead of getting to the root of what was really going on. There were times I wondered if I was truly helping people or just functioning inside a broken system.

Now, as a professional organizer, the tension looks different. I know what I do helps people, but the deeper reason I care about simplicity is spiritual. I believe the emptiness in our hearts was meant to be filled by Christ, not by more stuff. That can be hard to communicate publicly, but this question actually convicts me to be more prayerful and bolder about tying my “why” into my work.

As for how I navigate that tension, honestly, through prayer. I ask God to open and close doors according to His will, to make me always be about His glory no matter what I'm doing, and I ask Him for creativity and clarity when things feel "foggy." I have seen Him answer those prayers in small ways that often grow into bigger things over time.

3. Are you proud of yourself? Is your life what you envisioned for yourself when you were younger?

Oh, “proud” is a hard word for me. I do not naturally think of myself that way. But I can say that I am deeply grateful for my life. When I look at our family, Dad, Vada, and you, I feel overwhelmed in the best way. You are all more than I could have imagined, and each of you is so precious to me.

I also smile at God’s sense of humor in our family. You and your dad are so much alike, and Vada and I are so much alike, and we all seem to mesh like peanut butter and jelly. There is something really sweet about that to me. So while I may hesitate to say I am proud of myself, I can easily say I am very proud of my family.

As for whether my life looks like what I imagined when I was younger, yes and no. I always wanted to have children from my heart, and a husband that I respected and would be my best friend--I am so thankful the Lord gave me that. I always thought I might live in Africa one day, and there is still a part of me that longs for that. But I can also honestly say I am content with what God has chosen for us. I have always been a dreamer and an adventurer, and I think that is still true of me. I do not go looking for change, but I do want to stay open-hearted always to God's leading. What age has taught me is this: do not try to force your own version of the story. Receive what the Lord has for you with open hands. He is the Author, and He can be trusted.

Catherine's Questions for Gem

1. What is a question that you’ve asked God that still doesn’t have a clear answer?

“What will you have me do?” I truly haven’t gotten a clear answer.

2. What is a season of your life where you truly had to depend on God, and how did it change you?

The first one that comes to mind is the time shortly after I graduated from high school and didn’t get admission into university. I had the highest score on my university entrance exams in our class, and every teacher had said admission was sure for me. While my mates were registering in uni, I was learning hairstyling with girls who hadn’t even completed primary school. I didn’t have any connections to change my fate. I could only pray. Later, God used this situation to give me admission. I sometimes sat with my boss’s elderly dad, who would spend the time talking to me about his life. One day, he asked why I wasn’t in the university although I had graduated high school. I told him I had applied but hadn’t gotten admission. Turns out his brother was a professor at the university, and after he convinced his brother to take a look at my high school grades over the weekend, I got admission three days later. I learned a valuable lesson during that period: God sees you, even if you’re at the bottom of the ocean. Even if the odds are stacked against you, His plan for you will come to pass. It may tarry, but it WILL come. I may feel lost, but I am never lost to Him.

3. What breaks your heart about the world, and how do you feel God inviting you to respond?

The violence and how we have become used to it. On my side of the world, it has become so “normal” to view gory videos online, type RIP, scroll past, and go about your day as if nothing happened...forgetting that today’s victims were yesterday’s survivors and tomorrow’s victims will be yesterday’s survivors. I know that all of these things have been prophesied to happen in the last days, but I also believe that God invites me and many more who share my sentiment, to remember that we are lions. We must be of good courage, instilling it in our families and communities. We should live lives worth dying for.